Political dictionary

Political Dictionary

Here is a list of terms that are used by political idealogues that differ from or contradict their actual meanings.

Socialism

• Right Wing: Socialism is when the government does stuff I don't like. The more it does that I hate, the more socialist it is.

• Left Wing: Socialism is when the government does stuff I like. The more it does I like, the more socialist it is.

• Actual definition for sane people: The common or state ownership of the means of production.

Capitalism

• Right Wing: A free market economic system that is perfect and never does anything wrong.

• Left Wing: The root of all evil and a mechanism used by the rich and powerful to subjucate the poor and weak.

• Actual definition for sane people: An amoral economic system that allows for enterprise, trade, and industry to be controlled by private actors; allowing businesses to accrue and keep their capital/profit while having political implications.

Profit

• Right Wing: The only thing that drives people to do business.

• Left Wing: Ok when a worker does it, magically not ok when a business does it. Also all the money a company brings in.

• Actual definition for sane people: Any surplus revenue after obligations are met.

Revenue

• Right Wing: Some tax thingie.

• Left Wing: What the fuck is revenue?

• Actual Definition for sane people: Total declared income of an entity for a given period.

Market Failure

• Right Wing: What the fuck is a market failure?

• Left Wing: Markets are bad except when we make sure companies can't do that evil profit thing and need to support some kind of economic system that works because command/planned economies don't work at all.

• Actual Definition for sane people: Market distortions leading to the improper or skewed distribution of goods and services in a free market.